Comments for opentohopecaregivers.com

Comment on Move Over Michelle, Mama’s in the House: The Obamas Are a Multigenerational Family by Instant Personal loan

Instant Personal loan — Sat, 20 Jun 2009 16:51:42 +0000

See Michelle is triditional. You can’t trust nobody but your own mother to watch over your children and make sure that they are brought up with the same values and you .

Comment on Creating Memorial Services with Heart, Part of the Caregiving Journey by Online Payday Loans

Online Payday Loans — Wed, 27 May 2009 22:55:12 +0000

Thanks for all the tips. I think it is so important that we talk about these things with loved ones even if it is really hard. That way we have it all planned how they want it.

Comment on Does Caregiving Stress Your Marriage? Grow Closer in Your Caregiving Years by carolodell

carolodell — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 00:24:11 +0000

My heart goes out to you. You are my “Phillip,” my husband. We have three girls, been married 30 years (see the similarities?) I hear your devotion, and I hear your natural response that “I didn’t think life was going to take this turn.” I can’t tell you what’s up ahead, how long this will last, how you two will manage–but I know you will. You’ll find the next solution and then the next. I do encourage you to be that balance for you wife. As much as she’s trying to be there for her mom, you are there for her. You are her stress reliever–just your strength, your committment, your continuity.
I could have never faired as well as I did (and trust me, sometimes it wasn’t pretty) without my husband and daughters to balance me out. They kept me going and they helped me see the big picture. Family caregiving is very important–but so is your marriage and your health–and there does come a time when you have to put that first. In her heart, your mother-in-law will understand that you’re trying each day to do the right thing–for everyone.

Comment on Does Caregiving Stress Your Marriage? Grow Closer in Your Caregiving Years by Michael Ross

Michael Ross — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 12:56:22 +0000

I married my high school sweetheart and have know my mother in law for close to 40 years. I first meet her when I was 16. She was what every mother should be..kind, full of life, and willing to extend a hand to lift you up when things were keeping you down. I’ve been married 31 years. We have with two daughters that are college educated and both have weddings dates. They are starting their lives. I thought my wife were in the second phase of our marriage. I looked forward to re-connecting, increase travel, and enjoying the fruits of our labor. Two years ago we started seeing a change in my wife’s mother. The diagnosis was Alzheimer’s. I told my wife that we were not putting her nursing home but we would find a home to accommodate her needs and that I knew what I was signing up for. We sold our home of 21 years and moved my mother in law in with us. We have been all together for two years and the amount of hands on caring is increasing. The level of stress I see in her is frustrating. Men are fixers and this is something we cannot fix. I try to off-load her by doing the mundane task…Laundry, shopping, running errands but at times there’s nothing I can do to relieve her stress. I give her space, alert the kids not to ask her for anything, and pray for patience. This article is something I will keep and read often when I see her in a heighten level of stress. I will admit, I miss my wife and the life I thought we were about to have. I know this will come to and end but it is the journey I need focus on. I love my wife and will continue to support her as we go through this. Although at times I feel life is not fair.

Comment on Have You Taken Caregiving Too Far For Your Own Good? by Dane Petchul

Dane Petchul — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 22:13:05 +0000

Great and disturbing article. It is so important to have a plan in place well before a long-term care event occurs. Caring for an aging parent puts much stress on siblings especially siblings who have different ideas on how and where the care should be received. And who should be the caregiver. It is important to find a Long-Term Care Specialist with no bias toward any one carrier.

Comment on Have You Taken Caregiving Too Far For Your Own Good? by Betsy Clark

Betsy Clark — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 02:45:59 +0000

This is just excellent information and so well done. All caregivers should take the time to sit down and answer some of these questions honestly to assess their situations and plan for the necessary adjustments. I’m all for collaboration with any and all folks who are working hard to make sure that caregivers have access to as much support and as many resources as possible. May the blog links be abundant!

Donahue, I’d love to buy a copy of your CD because I’m always in the market for some stress management tools. Please e-mail me with the particulars at Betsy@feedinmama.com

Peace and blessings to all,
Betsy Clark
http://www.FeedinMama.com

Comment on Have You Taken Caregiving Too Far For Your Own Good? by When Caregiving Becomes an Obsession

When Caregiving Becomes an Obsession — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 23:42:27 +0000

[...] Have You Taken Caregiving Too Far For Your Own Good? by Carol O’Dell at The Caregiver Blog [...]

Comment on Have You Taken Caregiving Too Far For Your Own Good? by Mary Emma Allen

Mary Emma Allen — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 20:21:18 +0000

Great article, Carol. I agree. Caregiving can become almost overwhelming, but caregivers also can make it more overwhelming than it needs to be. They can become consumed by guilt so become obsessive in their care. They can, as you point out, use caregiving to avoid situations in their lives. They can become caught up in caregiving because they can’t say, “No.”

Thanks for the great article. I’ll refer my readers to it.

Comment on Does Caregiving Affect Women Differently? by Donna Emht

Donna Emht — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 22:41:41 +0000

Your words are lovely, but I must add a comment about my most loving father who cared for my Mom for ten years. She had Alzheimer’s disease for that long and never once did he envision his life without her. When she wouldn’t get out of her chair, he asked her to dance. When he wanted to go to Florida to experience the beach, he designed and had his son-in-law build a “lift” to get her in his small airplane. Nothing was impossible with this man and he was going to experience it with his bride, as he referred to my Mom. Two days before he died, he showed me the sailboat he was planning to purchase and how he would “adapt” it for his bride to accompany him on his ride. Yes, it was exhausting…. the pages of the 38 Hour Day were dog earred. But we also saw the enduring love in his caregiving which made an everlasing impression on his family and friends. I don’t know if his caregiving was different because he was a man. I can only hope that I will have the same joy in my heart to match his, so that I can mirror his self-less giving.
Thank you.

Comment on Have You Taken Caregiving Too Far For Your Own Good? by Donahue Vanderhider

Donahue Vanderhider — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 18:38:01 +0000

Love your blog!!!! I am always looking for good information to put into my newletter for caregivers, and unless you have an objection, I will be referring you to my readers.
I am gerontologists and have been working with caregivers for over a decade. They are an overworked, underappriciated and underserved group of people.

I even recently produced a stress management CD, specifically for caregivers. It utilizes guided imagery, which is a wonderful technique.
But I am not trying to sell my CDs to your readers, I just want to say hi and perhaps in the future we can colaborate on our common cause.
Donahue (soon to be at: caregiverrelief.com)